Despite living in the era of social media, many people hesitate sharing- and even simply mentioning anything that is not part of their highlight reel. We want to share only the positive things about our life because that’s what we were thought we should do. We’re also taught that people don’t truly care about us. And, even though we deny it, we do care about what the world thinks about us.
But the moment we start to be vulnerable– we think we’re doing something we shouldn’t do. We overexplain why we are sharing and overthink every word we say. We THINK we have to justify why we’re sharing what we’re sharing to others, but in reality, what we should really focus on is sharing our joys and especially our sadness with ourselves. We sometimes keep our emotions in a little box– waiting for someone worthy to share them with. In reality, we should lose the hesitation to open the box when we’re alone…. so we can face them head on. Without shame. Without the desire to be perfect. Without worrying about what they will think and just embrace our emotions. One by one. As they surface. And without wanting them to only be the positive emotions. Because, yes, the positive emotions are lovely, but the ones that we resist– often have the most wisdom and therefore, the most important life lessons.
So whenever someone wants to check in on you, don’t be afraid to be authentic. Especially if you trust that your stuff is safe with them. However, don’t forget to check in on yourself either.
Today's Guest
It’s amazing that today’s guest is YOU! 👏
We'll Talk About
– Question- How are you doing? How are you really doing?
– The tendency for surface-level responses to this question versus deep emotional honesty.
– Reasons for my personal hiatus.
– The tools that I’ve used for my personal development.
– The importance of being honest with yourself.
– My enthusiasm for future cozy converstaions with you.
episode Transcript
Haydee [00:00:00]:
Well, hello there. Have you missed me? Believe it or not, I have missed you greatly. My name is Haydee and this is the podcast where you are my precious guest. The question for you today is how are you doing? How are you REALLY doing? I know that hearing someone ask you this question can get you emotional right off the bat because you’re used to them asking “Hi, how are you?” And you replying, “Fine.” and then moving right along, totally evading your inner world. But as you know, I’m NOT looking for the vague non-response. I’m looking for the TRUTH. AND I can handle the truth regardless of what it is. No matter WHAT you tell me, I’ll be there.
Haydee [00:01:33]:
If you share that you’re doing wonderfully, I’ll rejoice with you. And if you tell me that you’re struggling, I’ll empathize and hold space for you. Before we go on any further, let me address the elephant in the room. Yes, I’ve been away for some time, but there are many reasons for that. Some good, some which are the opposite of that, and SOME that are natural. But overall, this time has benefited me significantly and I’m still benefiting from this slower pace. As you may recall, my word of the year is receive and I have been receiving a lot.
Haydee [00:02:23]:
A lot of peace, silence, reflection, aha moments, wisdom, discoveries, guidance, synchronicities, signs in nature, simplification, rest, skin care treatments, comfy blankets for all the seasons, beautiful mugs that soothe my eyes just by looking at them, a white flameless candle that has a scent that’s divine, AND an incredible amount of grounding. I’ve done A LOT of inner work. Some of it was comfortable and some of it, like shadow work, was not. But I did a whole book of it and by the end, I embraced it. I’ve also done courses and challenges about topics that I thought I could benefit from, but which have continued to guide me to look for the answers within myself. Most importantly, I’ve had more consistent and deeper conversations with God this year than I’ve ever had my entire life. And unlike last year, where I thought that the waves crashed into me, this year I’m grateful to say that I AM in that metaphorical small boat that I envisioned last year, rowing gently WITH the stream instead of against it.
Haydee [00:04:01]:
Sometimes. I even think that I’m paddleboarding in calm waters and apparently, my energy has risen because I’ve been lucky enough to win various things throughout the year. A couple weeks ago, for example, I won a giveaway despite there being more than 800 people participating. And the very next day, I won ANOTHER giveaway in which there were more than 1,300 people. Isn’t that WILD??!! I was blown away and I felt VERY blessed and VERY thankful. And yes, don’t get me wrong, I realize how ironic it is that I’m saying this when every month this year has been extremely challenging on a national scale and an international scale. If I was solely focused on politics, I wouldn’t have the serenity that I just described. But despite being well informed, it’s precisely that grounding and returning back to me and treating me with an IMMENSE amount of love, softness, grace and compassion that has been powerful enough to keep me peaceful and hopeful even in these EXTREMELY unsettling and historic times. But I’m not going to lie, the first few three months or so of this year were VERY hard for me on various fronts politically to begin with.
Haydee [00:05:45]:
And it didn’t help that my birthday was in that time frame. And guess what? I actually came to the conclusion that my birthday doesn’t need to be as special as I thought it needed to be in the last couple of years. So moving forward, my expectations for it are at an all-time low. But no matter how low my expectations go, I will be forever thankful to the people who care enough about me to remember my birthday and wish me a happy birthday not because of my expectations, but despite my expectations. Those first few months felt like the longest months in the history of months. I’m GLAD they’re over, not only politically, but personally. On a personal scale, they humbled me and they uplifted me
Haydee [00:06:45]:
at the same time, I realized that it was no longer what I did that gave me my worth. It was who I am that made me TRULY worthy. And the deep acceptance of that is why I’m not as embarrassed as I would be that I stopped producing podcasts for a while. It had nothing to do with you, but EVERYTHING to do with me. It was what I needed. And what I needed was to embrace my feminine flow more than ever. So to wrap it up, how am I doing? I’m hopeful about a brighter future that we ALL deserve. I’m enjoying this fall and looking forward to this winter, which give off that cozy, homey vibe that I adore so much.
Haydee [00:07:38]:
And guess what? I’m done with practically all of my Christmas shopping and my shopping for most of my upcoming birthday gifts, including next year’s birthdays. So that’s a plus and a blessing. Yes, I’ve been giving to myself, too. And from a full cup,. I’m also ready to give to others. And guess what? I even bought a couple of things for this podcast. I bought a portable microphone so I can make audios more often, although I couldn’t manage to get them to work when I charged them. I even reached out to customer support, but I haven’t applied their suggestions yet due to everything I’ve mentioned. And I got myself a white vegan leather super comfortable office chair that looks like a throne because I deserve it and I want to be super comfortable and cozy when I’m talking to you.
Haydee [00:08:41]:
I don’t know if you’ve ever heard about numerology, but the personal and collective crumbling that we’re experiencing is not by chance. If you add up all the numbers in 2025, you get a total of nine and nine is a year of endings. The good news is that it’s almost over and that next year is a year of beginnings. And I hear that it’s supposed to be better than this year. By the looks of it, I think that ANY year would be better than this year, RIGHT? I’m asking you to please insert an imaginary sweat emoji in here 😅 because OMG! It’s been rough and I have no intention of denying it. So now that I aired out all my laundry, so to speak, I’ll ask you again and hopefully you can allow yourself to open your heart as widely and as vulnerably as you can. How are you really doing? Come on, tell me. I know you want to.
Haydee [00:09:54]:
At least admit it to yourself, will you? I can’t WAIT to hear your response. So share it with me on social media or via the contact form because I know that this can be, you know, a private answer that you might want to keep between you and I. You could do so by contacting me via the contact form on my website, which is www.voluptuousquestions.com/contact. Or if you’re more open about your response, you can do so on www.voluptuousquestions.com/podcasts and simply look for this episode to write your comment under. It’s ALWAYS a delight to interact with you. And believe it or not, even when I’m silent, I’m thinking of upcoming episodes and cozy conversations that I’d like to have with you. And I’ve written them down so I don’t forget. Because you and I, my friend, still have a lot of things to talk about.
Haydee [00:11:06]:
But conversations are SO delicious that finding the best timing and frame of mind for them is really important. So we will meet again when it’s time. Plus, we’re always connected in spirit. Remember, you are the star of this podcast and the star of your life. Keep shining brightly always. ✨⭐️✨
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